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Fic: Harder to Breathe 5/?
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Title: Harder to Breathe
Rating: PG-13
Pairings/Characters: Kurt/Blaine; Mr. and Mrs. Anderson
Warnings: anaphylactic shock and medical squick
Word Count: ~3500 this chapter (~20,700 so far)

Summary: Friday night dinner at the Hudmels' becomes a nightmare when Rachel brings dessert and Blaine neglects a childhood allergy.

A/N: I planned on this one being up sooner, but you can blame Darren Criss for having too many shows this weekend and for making me cry like a small child after I finally got to thank him. So.

Again, not a trained professional, though this chapter is medical!light in the grand scheme of it.

And many, many thanks to preciousmellow who is the reason this exists, and who greatly encouraged me to finish this chapter and pep talked me through it. And because she's generally fabulous.

- - - - -

“You’re okay, Blaine.”

Kurt keeps his hand against Blaine’s chest, continues to rub comforting circles across Blaine’s collarbone. He can feel how rapidly Blaine’s breathing, the way the breaths seem to catch and cut off. He imagines it’s a combination of the broken ribs and how strange Blaine’s neck must feel, and he tries to offer comfort for that, ease the pain away.

Carrie’s moved to stand next to Kurt, smiling at her son in what she hopes is a reassuring way. Blaine’s eyes shift rapidly between them, as if he’s not sure who to look at. John has yet to return with a doctor, and Kurt’s mildly worried Blaine’s going to work himself into a panic attack if he continues to breathe as quickly as he is. 

“Relax, Blaine. You’re in the hospital, and you’re safe. Just focus on me.”

Kurt’s not sure how he’s managing to stay so calm, but it’s working to calm Blaine down, so he tamps down on his emotions and focuses on Blaine. He mutters strings of nonsense syllables, keeps his voice even and quiet. Blaine tracks back to Kurt, blinking heavily, as though staying awake is taking effort.

Blaine opens his mouth again, experimentally trying to force out a sound. He manages a quiet grunt, a flash of pain crossing his face as he works his throat. He meets Kurt’s eyes again, pleading for an explanation. 

“Blaine, you-” Kurt stumbles, suddenly afraid that he’ll say the wrong thing, say too much. It’s not exactly his place, he’s not got any say or pull over Blaine’s care. Not for the first time, he feels entirely out of his element. Carrie rests a gentle warning hand on his arm, steps up to take over for him. 

“Blaine, sweetheart, you had an allergic reaction.”

Blaine turns his face towards his mother, rolling his lips under before parting them slightly. They’re chapped and dry, sticking together, and Blaine pokes out his tongue to attempt to wet them. Kurt hisses, bends to dig in his shoulder bag and pulls out a tube of chapstick. 

“Here,” he says quietly, spreading some on his finger. Kurt leans back over Blaine, gently runs his finger along Blaine’s lips, trying to soothe them. Blaine presses his lips together gratefully, and Kurt pulls back, wiping the excess chapstick on his jeans before he thinks about it.

“Thank you,” Blaine tries, his voice so quiet and rough that Kurt’s not sure if he’s actually heard Blaine, or if he’s imagined it. Blaine frowns at Kurt’s expression, but chooses instead to turn back to his mother.

“What-?”

He’s barely speaking, more like mouthing the words, and Kurt finds himself wishing he could read lips, understand Blaine without making Blaine stretch himself too thin. Blaine’s about to try again, force the words out, but Kurt stops him with a firm hand against the side of Blaine’s face.

“Shhh,” he whispers, brushing a thumb against Blaine’s lips. “Rest your voice. Your mom will explain.”

“You were at Kurt’s house, do you remember that? Friday night?”

Blaine nods, brow furrowing as he thinks back. Realization dawns on his face, and he looks back to Kurt, who smiles sadly at him.

“You ended up ingesting something with sesame in it, Blaine. Do you remember that?”

Blaine meets Kurt’s eyes, and Kurt knows he’s remembered something. Kurt tilts his head gently, nods, and he and Blaine silently come to an understanding-Blaine remembers making out, remembers Kurt above him, but doesn’t remember much else. They’ll talk about it later, Kurt knows, once Blaine’s processed nearly dying and the hole in his throat. Until then, that conversation will sit on the back burner.

“Blaine?”

He turns back towards his mother, and nods minutely. She takes his hand in hers, squeezes gently.

“It was a bad reaction, Blaine. You didn’t have your EpiPen on you, and-well, do you remember that one you had back in second grade? At grandma’s house?”

Blaine nods again, wrinkling his nose at his mother. Kurt wonders if that was how they found out about Blaine’s allergy, if that was the first reaction he’d ever had, and the reason he's been told to carry an EpiPen. He realizes it would make sense-it's been nearly ten years since his last severe reaction, no wonder Blaine's gotten complacent.

“Well, it was-it was a little worse than that one, Blaine. You-” 

Carrie trails off, puts her free hand on top of the one she’s already joined with Blaine’s.

“Blaine, they had to do CPR.”

The statement sits heavily in the air, hangs between them as both Carrie and Kurt watch Blaine comprehend what that means. It's clear when it finally dawns, when Blaine comprehends that needing to have CPR means that he nearly died. Blaine’s face pales, his eyes fall closed and his head falls flat against the pillow.

“Honey-”

Blaine pulls his hand from his mother’s, shrinks as small as he can. He draws back even from Kurt’s hand, into himself as the gravity of what’s happened hits him. It’s obvious he’s feeling overwhelmed, and Kurt slides off the bed, gives Blaine a bit of room. Carrie doesn’t move, her hand hovering awkwardly over Blaine’s arm even as Kurt steps behind her.

“Blaine, everything is okay now. You’re okay.”

Blaine’s eyes open again, and he looks at his mother, bringing a hand up to the gauze at his neck again, questioning. Carrie understands what he’s asking, nods and takes his hand, pulls it gently away from his neck.

“Your doctor will come explain that to you,” she tells him, setting his hand next to him on the bed, before reaching up to brush his bangs from his forehead. “They had to make sure you could breathe, that was most important, okay? We can deal with everything else, what matters is that you’re okay.”

Blaine nods, parts his lips to try to say something else, but is cut off by the arrival of John and one of the nurses on the floor. 

“He’s still awake?”

“He’s tried talking a few times, and yes, he’s still awake. He can also hear you, John.”

Carrie’s smile softens the edge to her words, and she steps back, lets John take her place beside the bed. The nurse-Ally-introduces herself and goes about taking down Blaine’s vitals, checking the IV bag and the port in the back of Blaine’s hand. She looks up, curiously watching John approach his son awkwardly.

John steps up, hands dangling at his sides as he meets Blaine’s eyes. Neither of them makes a move, John shifting on his feet awkwardly while Blaine eyes him apprehensively. Ally stands opposite, eyes flicking between her patient and his father before she interrupts.

“I know you’ve just gotten him back, but I should probably look Blaine over before the doctor heads up to speak to you?”

“Of course,” Carrie responds, squeezing Blaine’s knee through his blanket and taking John’s hand in hers. She tugs him gently backwards from the bed, and Kurt follows. 

“We’ll be just outside, Blaine.”

They leave the room, and suddenly Blaine’s alone with Ally, unable to effectively communicate much of anything. She smiles at him, pulls a chair up to the bed and sits on it backwards so she can talk to him.

“You looked a little overwhelmed with them all staring at you like that,” she tells him, leaning forward and resting her chin on crossed arms. "I figured I'd give us a bit of a chance to talk, see how you're doing without them hovering."

She watches his face for his reaction, when it dawns on her.

“Your throat’s killing you, isn’t it?”

Blaine nods, biting his bottom lip as he rolls his head towards her. Ally stands, removes her stethoscope from the pocket of her scrub coat and leans over the bed.

“Let me check you over real quick, and then we’ll see about getting you something for the pain, and getting your family back in here.”

She folds down the top of his gown, places the bowl of the stethoscope against his chest. 

“Can you try to take a deep breath for me?”

He does his best, his breath catching at the end thanks to his ribs. She has him do it a few more times, before fixing his gown up and replacing her stethoscope. She pulls on a pair of gloves from the box next to the bed, before gently peeling back the gauze at his neck. Turning to the side, she drops the old gauze in the trash, before pulling out a fresh stack and turning back to the bed.

“I'm just going to check the wound real quick,” she tells him, feeling gently around the incision and his neck, checking for signs of infection or issues, before replacing the gauze with the fresh set, taping it down. She disposes of her gloves, and turns back to Blaine, regarding him carefully.

“It seems like everything’s coming along nicely. Your ribs seem a little painful, is that the case?”

Blaine whispers an affirmative response, still taken aback at how rough his voice sounds. He tries again, but Ally stops him with another question.

“It hurts to talk, doesn’t it?”

“Little bit,” Blaine gets out, breathing in sharply. His voice is raw and quiet; forcing sounds out moves his throat in ways he’s not quite ready to contemplate. Ally hums sympathetically, drops back into the chair.

“Anyone explain to you what happened?”

Blaine shakes his head, blinks at her. Ally nods, and rests a hand on his shoulder to keep speaking to him.

“The swelling in your throat was too severe by the time the paramedics arrived. They couldn’t get it down quickly enough to get you oxygen, and they couldn’t secure an airway any other way. It’s not permanent, but they had to cut that hole in your trachea to get you oxygen, Blaine.”

Blaine blinks, his jaw drops slightly, and he raises his hand back to his neck. He finally understands what is underneath the gauze, what the cause of the pain is. He thinks if he tries hard enough, he can feel it all the way through to his windpipe, the open wound and the pain. It's itchy and uncomfortable and he's definitely sure he doesn't like it. He keeps his fingers over the gauze, seeks out Ally again.

“It’s gonna hurt for awhile, and talking’s going to be frustrating for a bit, too. But you’ll get there. It’s already knitting, so it hopefully won’t be too long. You’re lucky, Blaine.”

He scoffs quietly, drops his hand back to his side and closes his eyes, swallowing. The wound in his neck is impossible to forget about, and pulling air past the the open incision burns. He bites his lip at a particularly sharp twinge, and sucks in a breath.

Ally catches it, squeezes his shoulder reassuringly before standing up.

“I’ll bring you some ice, it’ll help soothe the burn from how dry your throat is and give you something to wet your mouth. I’ll also check with your doctor, see if we can get some pain meds in you. I’ll be right back. You want me to send your parents back in?”

Blaine nods, and within seconds Carrie and John are back at his side, Kurt hanging back by the doorway. Ally slips out of the room, returning a few moments later to press a Styrofoam cup filled with ice chips and a spoon into Carrie’s hand.

“Only a few at a time, but they’ll help his throat.” She smiles at Blaine before continuing, “I also have some mild painkillers that will take the edge off.”

Ally pulls a syringe and a small glass vial from her pocket, draws up the correct dosage of medication and uncaps the port. She pauses to turn Blaine's wrist, check the birthdate on his admission bracelet, before hooking the syringe into the IV line and depressing the medication. 

"That should help somewhat. It's nothing too strong, just to take the edge off your ribs and the cut in your neck. Dr. Waltman will be up in a bit and can give you something stronger if you need it. I'll be outside at the desk-j
ust give a shout if you need anything. You're doing great, Blaine."

She smiles at everyone in the room in turn, then she’s gone, and suddenly, they’re alone again. Carrie pulls Ally’s abandoned chair up to the bed, and offers Blaine the cup of ice chips.

“Do you want my help?” she asks quietly, and Blaine nods. Carrie scoops a few onto the spoon, tipping them gently into Blaine’s mouth. His eyes flutter closed as the ice melts, and Carrie puts the cup on the bedside table, in easy reach. She brushes a hand through Blaine’s curls, smiles sadly at him.

“How are you feeling, sweetheart?”

Blaine shrugs noncommittally, cracks an eye open to look at Carrie.

“Hurts,” he breathes out, gesturing vaguely at both his neck and ribs. Carrie sighs, lets her thumb rub gently along the edge of the gauze as she drops her hand from his head.

“I wish I could take it away,” she whispers, more to herself than Blaine. He frowns up at her, tries to communicate with his eyes that he doesn’t fault her. John clears his throat, steps closer to the bed.

“Blaine.”

Blaine rolls his head towards his father, watches as John drops into the chair opposite Carrie. He suddenly feels tense, almost afraid of what his father will say or do, but John remains quiet, simply sits back in the chair and watches Blaine. 

Before anyone can speak, break the silence, there’s a quiet knock at the door, and they all turn to see Carole standing in the entrance to the room, dressed in her scrubs but with a backpack slung over her shoulder.

“I hope I’m not interrupting? I was clocking in for my shift, and figured I’d check in on you all and bring Kurt a change of clothes.”

She steps into the room, greets Carrie and John before turning to Kurt. She pulls him into a hug, pressing the bag into his hands.

“I figured you’d want a change of clothes,” she says by way of explanation. Kurt smiles, opens the bag to find a complete outfit. 

“Rachel helped you?”

“Did it myself, kiddo. Don’t underestimate my style.”

“Oh, thank god,” Kurt breathes, zipping the backpack up and hugging Carole. “I was starting to feel disgusting in these clothes. I could use a shower, though.”

“I’m sure you all could. If you want, I can let you into the staff locker room when we’re done here.” Carole turns back towards Blaine’s parents, extending the invitation to them as well. “I can get you guys a set of scrubs, if you want to change? I know you’ve been here for a long time.”

“You’re too kind,” Carrie says in thanks, standing to fully shake Carole’s hand. “I’m not sure we’ve properly been introduced.”

“Carole Hummel. I’m Kurt’s stepmom, but Blaine here’s found a way to make us all fall in love with him.”

“He tends to have that affect on people,” Carries says fondly, smiling back at Blaine, who’s blushing furiously. She releases Carole’s hand and returns to her place by the bed. Carole finally focuses on Blaine, smiling at him warmly.

“How are you feeling, sweetie?” 

She steps up to the foot of the bed, rests a hand gently on Blaine’s ankle.

“You gave us quite a scare.”

“Us?” Blaine rasps out, looking back to Carrie and then John, before raising an eyebrow at Carole.

“Carole helped-uh, Carole helped me,” Kurt pipes in from the doorway, finally rejoining the conversation. “With the CPR.”

He’s only got eyes for Blaine at this point, understands that he’s just told Blaine something that could easily freak Blaine out. How do you process that your boyfriend is literally the reason you’re still alive? 

Blaine, for his part, looks stunned, but his eyes dart between Kurt and Carole equally, and he seems simultaneously overwhelmed and terrified. He catches Kurt’s eye, mouths “thank you” before holding a hand out to Carole. 

She takes his offered hand in hers, squeezes tightly. Blaine’s eyes are filling with tears, a few spilling over onto his cheeks. 

“Thank you,” he tries to say, but it comes out as barely more than a hoarse whisper. He drops her hand as the tears really begin to fall. She shakes her head, rubs a hand reassuringly along his arm as he cries, trying to hide the fact that he’s crying from everyone in the room.

“It’s okay, Blaine. You don’t have to thank me. You’re as much a part of my family as Kurt at this point.”

Kurt shifts uncomfortably, acutely aware that his family has accepted Blaine in ways Carrie and John haven’t been able to accept him. He doesn’t quite fault them for that anymore-the weekend he’s just spent with them has given him all kinds of insights into John Anderson, but it still makes for awkward conversation.

“We never really thanked you either,” John says, reaching to shake Carole’s hand. “If it weren’t for you, for Kurt, I don’t-I’m not-”

“Please don’t thank me,” Carole responds, squeezing John’s hand. “It’s not exactly my pleasure, and I wish I hadn’t needed to, but you don’t need to thank me.”

Carole runs a hand over her eyes, brushes away her own gathering tears, before smiling back at Blaine.

“I’m going to take Kurt to get cleaned up, but I’ll stop in before the end of my shift. Take care of yourself, Blaine, and get some rest. I’ll send him back in a little while.”

Kurt gestures for Carole to wait, and bends over Blaine, drops a kiss to his cheek before leaning to whisper in his ear.

“I’m leaving you your cell. I have mine. We can text each other if you need to tell me anything, okay?”

Blaine nods, and Kurt slips the phone into his hand, lets his knuckles brush against Blaine’s as he pulls away.

“Love you.”

“Love you,” Blaine breathes, closing his fingers around the phone and watching Kurt and Carole leave the room. He lets his eyes fall closed again, breathes as deeply as he can against his ribs before turning to look at John.

“You scared us, Blaine,” John says, and there’s an edge to his voice Blaine hasn’t heard since he woke up after the Sadie Hawkins. “When Kurt called us-when we showed up and they had to explain that they cut a hole in your neck-”

“John,” Carrie warns, looking at him over the bed. He takes a deep breath, collects himself, before putting a hand on Blaine’s shoulder.

“Blaine, I just-I hate worrying about you like this, and I hate that I can’t keep you safe forever, and why the hell was your EpiPen in the car and not on you?”

“‘M sorry,” Blaine manages, his fingers tightening around the phone in his hand and his breathing increasing. He turns back towards Carrie, seeks her out in the way he always has when John gets like this.

“Maybe this isn’t the best time for this conversation,” she says, stroking a hand along Blaine’s arm in a comforting gesture. He calms beneath her hand, but keeps looking at her, as though almost afraid to turn back to his father. John’s hands clench in his lap against his will, and a pang of guilt shoots through him.

It’s not that Blaine’s afraid of him, or that Blaine doesn’t love him. 

What bothers him is that, when Blaine needs comfort-and Blaine does, right now, so very badly-it’s Carrie he turns to, Carrie he seeks that from.

Blaine associates John with discipline and disappointment, and now, when Blaine’s scared and upset and needs his parents, it’s Carrie he thinks of.

That hurts worse than John cares to admit right now, but he pushes that away, and focuses on Blaine. 

He tightens his hold on Blaine’s shoulder, brings Blaine’s attention back towards him.

“Blaine-”

Blaine’s eyes are unreadable-clouded over with pain and confusion and maybe a bit of fear, and John bites his lip, forces down everything else he wants to say, address.

“I love you.”

It’s the first time he’s actually said it aloud in a long time, and Blaine’s clearly taken aback. He blinks heavily at his father, brain working through what’s just happened, before it slams into him and he gasps. 

Fresh tears gather in Blaine’s eyes as he looks at John, who’s biting back his own.

“Love you,” Blaine replies simply, his voice even more rough with choked off sobs. He tugs on John’s shirt sleeve, pulls his father down towards the bed. John resists at first, unsure, but Blaine’s insistent. 

He pulls John into an awkward hug, using the leverage he has to pull himself into a semi-sitting position as he embraces his father.

It’s the first hug they’ve shared in four years.

They’re both crying openly when they pull away.

“I love you so much, Blaine, and I’m sorry. I’m sorry I don’t tell you. I’m sorry.”

Blaine tries to speak, finds he can’t force the right words out, so he settles for resting his hand against John’s heart, whispers the only thing he can without causing himself excess pain.

“I love you.



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Hi! This is my first time leaving a comment here, but I just wanted to let you know that I really this fic. I look forward to the next update =)

<333 Thank you so much! I love feedback, so I appreciate the comment :) I'm glad you're enjoying it, and thanks for reading! <3

i'm feeling all the papa!anderson feelings skjdncskdjcnscd
i love this so much
this chapter was so fluffy yet so angsty
only you make those two work together!

I have had a surprising number of Papa Anderson!feels while writing this. And thank you <3333 I'm so glad you're loving it, and I really appreciate the feedback :)

Thanks for reading! <3

You almost made me cry, dammit! I get excited every time I see your name, this is really pretty amazing.

Oh wow thank you so much <33

I'm glad you're loving it and thank you <3

I was going to go to sleep, but then I saw that you updated and I was like screw sleep! Who needs sleep!

Seriously, tears in my eyes for this chapter. John is really blossoming here and I'm loving it. The Anderson men needed to talk with one another! Blaine really needed to hear that from his father.

I can't wait to see what happens next.

<333 Thank you so much! I'm really surprised by how this is turning out too, and the reaction it's getting so thank you! I really appreciate that you've taken the time to read and leave feedback <3

I'm glad you're loving it!!

Glad that Blaine and his father sort things out between them!

oh my god so many emotions. :')

NEGL, I got pretty misty eyed writing the end haha. I'm glad you're enjoying it! Thanks for reading <3

To recap:

Everyone loves Blaine. Blaine loves everyone. Blaine just hugged his dad. For the first time in four years. Made me woobie a little bit, not gonna lie. And now? I love you.

Gah!

LOVE ALL THE PEOPLE!! haha but no, thank you. <3333 I'm glad you've enjoyed it so far! <3

omg crying all over the place omg coherent comments unable to write right now

*hugs* Oh man, I'll take that as a good thing :) Thank you so much for reading <3

oh such a terrific chapter!
oh the emotions! love it!

Thank you so very much <3 I really appreciate you taking the time to read and comment <33

tears rolling down my cheeks. You can't get a compliment from me any better than that.

<3333 *hugs* Thank you so much! I'm glad you're loving it! <3

I can't quite blink the tears out of my eyes after reading this, especially the conversation at the end between Blaine and his father! I love how many times John starts to talk to his son and is then interrupted, as it does a wonderful job of building the suspense as I was wondering exactly what John was going to say when he finally got the chance! I also love the silent communication between Kurt and Blaine, how they clearly don't need to talk to be able to share the important things that need to be said.

<333 Thank you so much for reading and leaving feedback! I'm glad you loved the ending as well-I really enjoyed writing that :D Thank you! <3

klradjfkljsdafkajsldfawejklf

<33 Thank you!!! Keysmashes are the best :D

(Deleted comment)
<33333 IDK John Anderson is like becoming my favorite person to write why is this happening? haha but thank you bb <33333

ahhhh daddy issues resolved! How cute was Carole too? Gah. So glad for an update! <3

They're getting there. IT's all just so emotional right now haha :D But thank you so much for reading! <3

Creys. I love this fic so much. I love that you're going beyond just the allergic reaction and focusing on their family dynamic too. Can't wait for more xx

<333 That happened completely unexpectedly, I intended this to be so much simpler but what can you do. Thanks for reading, and I'm glad you're loving it!! <33

All the feelings for Blaine and his dad <3
I love this fic **

SO MANY BLAINE DADDY!FEELS. All of the feels. :D Thank you so much for reading <3

He's awake!

Epipen in the car? Doh!

*Sigh*

This was great.

<3333 Kurt will be having some words with Blaine as to the care and keeping of his epipen. Thanks for reading <33

So glad to see him recovering, body and soul! I just love the little moments between Blaine and Kurt, and later the nurse too.

He's getting there. Slowly but surely :) Thanks so much for reading and leaving feedback <333

I'll just. I'll just go and be in that corner. You know, with the corner and me crying and I"ll be ok. Time. It just takes time woiajmfnhdbsylufar mtoaj;sfdnga BEATUFKU

*hugsssssss* I'm so glad you liked it :D Thank you so very much <3

Here's to hoping the internet holds out long enough for me to comment!

I have so many things to say about this! First off, it was perfect. I don't know what you were worried about. I love your ability to find the perfect mix of medical information and emotions, so neither one is overwhelming.

First off, your attention to detail kills me. Blaine's chapped lips, Kurt having lip chap ready, how sore is throat is, how uncomfortable it is to breathe. All things that add to the realism of the story, so it's obvious you know what you're talking about. (Also can I tell you how incredibly happy it made me that Ally checked Blaine's birth date before she gave him his meds. I am seriously in love with how accurate your fics are even in terms of hospital policies). While we're on that subject, I love all the nurses you write. I love how Ally understood that Blaine was feeling overwhelmed, and took the time to explain to him what happened.

And honestly, you were worried about the one sided conversations, but I thought they were very good. You showed how confused Blaine was, how difficult it was for him to talk and how he didn't really understand what was happening, even without him talking much, and I never felt like he was forgotten. The opposite in fact. The scenes with Blaine and John were so poignant and so touching. I definitely teared up when John told Blaine he loved him. It reminded me of my uncle, who died when he was 16, and my grandpa and him never got along, but when something is taken away from you, or almost, that's when you realize how much they mean to you. That's when you realize that stupid fights don't matter, and you can get over your differences and realize what's important. Which I think is exactly what John did. He realized how close he was to really losing Blaine, and he could never forgive himself if Blaine died and he never told him he loved him. Ugh, you are just the master of Anderfeels (see what I did there??)

Oh! I almost forgot. The way you wrote Kurt in this just broke my heart. How he was there for Blaine, wanted to be there for him, but when Blaine's family was there he stepped back, let Blaine be with his family, knew how important this was for Blaine. And he was so humble. Blaine knew about the CPR but Kurt didn't say anything about who did it, until Carole came in and he it was unavoidable. And the moment between them, when Blaine figured out that it was KURT who did the CPR, KURT who saved Blaine's life. I can't wait to see what comes of that, how Blaine reacts to the information and how they deal with it.

So I know I just wrote like a novel comment. But really, I just love this so much. You've gone so far beyond just a fun angsty (fangsty? haha no) fic about Blaine having an allergic reaction and CPR and a cric and whatever else it was that started our epic conversations that led to this fic. Seriously. You are an amazing writer :) and I'm going to be poking you with my big stick until you write the next part! Only because I love you.

Come let me love you ugh youuuuuuu. The details thing is like, IDK, something I've always been invested in and the hospital policies thing too. I'm just so sick of reading bad!medical fic where so much is neglected and never researched and so I add as much as I can. So if that means I add in the part where she checks his birthdate, then that's what I do haha.

And yeah, I worked most of it out in the end. I'm so glad you picked that up with John's attitude toward Blaine, because that's exactly what I'm going for. It won't be all better and it's far from perfect but almost losing Blaine made him realize that he doesn't want to not be in Blaine's life, and if he kept at it the way he had been, well, Blaine wasn't very interested in having much of a relationship with him. ugh ANDERFEELS.

What even has this become hahahaha it's a monster of feels and emotions now.

And I'll return the poking with a stick and grabby hands over the next part of lovesong :DDD <3333 love you! <3

I get so excited whenever I see a new chapter of this fic posted to k_b. I literally gasped, said, "Yay!" and immediately clicked. Lol such a dork.

I love the family dynamic issues you're exploring with the Andersons. And I love all the interaction between Kurt and Blaine, especially Kurt giving Blaine the cell phone so he can text him if he needs to- smart move, Kurt!

:DDDDDDD that makes me super excited oh man. I'm really enjoying writing this, so I'm glad you're loving it as well! Thanks so much for reading <3333

OMG! I was so excited when I saw that you updated! It is so good! I am so glad that Blaine woke up and is slowly recovering. There were so many things that I loved in this chapter.

I loved the way that Kurt was able to keep calm himself and help keep Blaine calm. What Kurt did took a lot of strength, and I can totally see him doing that.

I also loved the conversation between the Andersons and Blaine. I have all the Andercreys right now! Carrie is such a good Mom. She loves her son, no matter what. I also love how John is coming around, the hug at the end, my creys. I was sobbing.

But I think my favorite bit was where Kurt gave Blaine the cell phones. It just seemed so in character for Kurt and Blaine, and it was just so sweet. I can totally see Kurt leaning in and gently giving the phone to Blaine. I also can only imagine how Kurt was barely holding it together, I hope he got a good Carole hug!

I love this fic! I can't wait for the next update. (Again, sorry for the novel.) Happy holidays! :)

jdfakdjf thank you so much <33

I'm glad you loved Kurt-I think that's a big thing here, especially with how guilty he still feels/everything he himself is going through, but I really think he'd be able to push past that for Blaine. And ANDERCREYS ALL OVER. I keep having all the Blaine feels, and the John feels. FEELS.

And :DDD the cell phones come into play in the next chapter, so I'm glad you liked that :D Thank you so very much for reading, and I love love love your feedback so don't apologize :DD

Happy holidays!! <33

I've been waiting to have a free moment all day to read this.

I was so prepared to be mad at Blaine's father for starting in on him and then you hit me with that moment at the end. He's redeeming himself. So tender. There are tears in my eyes.

<3333 Blaine's dad is trying, definitely. He's getting there, but it's not all going to be sunshine and rainbows haha :D But thank you so very much <3 I really appreciate the feedback <3

Just stab me in the heart. Just do it. Oh my god, this fic, it will kill me, I swear.

*hugs* oh no!! Haha but thank you <3 I'm glad you're liking it so far :DD Thank you for reading <333

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